Caring for Elderly Parents: 7 Important Tips

Caregiving for elderly parents can often feel daunting, particularly at the start as you have to work out the extent of care they need, the options that are available to both yourself and them, and learning how to make decisions together. Part of being an effective carer for your parents is making sure that you are effectively caring for yourself too. If you have recently found yourself in a position whereby you are considering or have begun to care for your parents, here are 7 important tips to help you along the way. 

1. Understand Your Parents’ Needs

When it comes to caring for your parents, it is not a one size fits all scenario. There are many areas that might need your assistance, and you should take a step back and understand where your parents’ main needs are. 

Key areas to consider include:

• Mobility
• Cognitive function
• Hygiene
• Cooking 
• Socializing
• General safety

Consider each of these categories and work out how much help they will need for each one to give you a clearer understanding of how much time you will need to dedicate to them or how you can ensure that they are getting the help they need. For example, if you have a parent who hates cooking or can’t muster the strength to cook for themselves anymore, your main caregiving role would be to organize meal transportation to your parents. Additionally, if you have a parent worried about being a victim of crime, you could help them install CCTV cameras or an alarm security system to help them feel safer. 

2. Know Your Capabilities and Limitations

When our parents start to age or begin to face health complications, it is natural for us to want to do everything we can for our parents. However, sometimes you need to take a step back and acknowledge your limitations and capabilities in a realistic light, and not be clouded by the idea of family loyalty. 

Before committing to anything, ask yourself the following. 

• Are you physically fit enough to care for others?
• Do you live close enough to your parents to be able to visit them regularly?
• Do you have any other care roles in your life that require your attention, for example, children? 
• Is your mental health in a fit enough state to be taking on more stresses in your life?

Remember, it is not selfish if you have to share the caring responsibilities with other help. You are better off knowing from the start how much you can take on, as opposed to taking it all on and then burning out. 

3. Explore Aging Care Options

You do not have to take on all of the caring responsibility for your parents alone, there are many aging care options that you can use alongside. For example, you can hire senior care New Jersey with professional in-home caregivers who will care for your parents in their own home. You can do this with ease by contacting a home care agency. If your parent(s) is not able to live at home anymore you may want to consider an assisted living community or a nursing home. People tend to shy away from nursing homes because they worry about the conditions, if you have these reservations you can learn more about nursing home abuse to ensure that you know your rights and what warning signs to look out for. There are plenty of aging care options that are wholeheartedly dedicated to providing good care, but it just might take some time to find the right one for your parents. Learn how wellness programs enhance senior lives and provide a safe environment for them. Also, don’t forget to research and explore financial assistance options that may be available for your parents’ care.

4. Let Your Parents’ Have A Say In The Process

This brings us nicely onto our next point, which is letting your parents have a say in the process. If you are considering aging care options, talk to them and see what they think. As we get older, more of our decisions can be taken away from us and so it is important to allow our parents as much as say as realistically possible. This is important for the dignity, autonomy and mental health purposes, so do not underestimate the impact of just hearing what your parents have to say. 

5. Communication Is Key

Communication is key for a successful caregiver – care receiver relationship. Let your parents tell you how they are feeling and equally, you should tell them how you are feeling. A common problem for our aging community is loneliness, and effective communication can help to reduce those feelings of being alone. Another useful way to keep communication going is to make sure your parents have access to an easy-to-use mobile phone so that they can easily message and make calls when they want. Aside from it being a useful tool to combat loneliness, it is also a good way to keep them safe as they can call someone in case of emergency. 

6. Accept Help From Others

Don’t try to be a hero and take everything on! Where help is available, make sure that you take it. If you have siblings and can share caregiving duties amongst you, then work out a schedule to do so. This will keep everyone fresh and provide caregivers with the much-needed respite that they require. Taking time off will mean you come back feeling refreshed and allows you to provide better care, as opposed to being burnt out and providing inadequate care. Additionally, if you have taken too much on, it is okay to take a step back and explore other options. This does not make you selfish, it makes you human. 

7. Implement A Routine

Creating a routine for your elderly parents will make the whole process much easier. If they know that they are receiving meals/groceries at a particular time, or that they are having a daily family phone call at a specific time then this provides them with structure. It is also important for them to have things to look forward to, and while a phone call might be trivial to some, it may mean the world to an elderly parent who is feeling lonely. So having something like that scheduled in will help them mentally. 

 

Beginning to care for aging parents can be a difficult process, but hopefully, with these 7 important tips, you will find a way to make it work well for both you and your parents.